I Hit a Beer

"TheRealBicycleBuck" (therealbicyclebuck) 07/07/2017 at 13:31 • Filed to: None

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I made the 600 mile trip to my in-laws yesterday. An hour into the trip, something shiny flew out from under the pickup in the adjacent lane and my WRX tried to eat it. It bounced around under the car and shot out the side, heading for the center median. My wife and daughter were behind me and said it looked like a beer can. If so, it had to be unopened. Just look what it did to my car!

This is the bottom lip of the front fascia. It doesn’t look too bad at first, but as they say, “Enhance!”

The plastic flexed enough for the paint to spiderweb all around the impact area. After hitting there, it went inside and hit the radiator support.

This was a lucky thing. An inch higher and it would have hit the condenser and radiator.

Half an hour later, it happened again. Except this time, it was a rock. The rock went under my car and was kicked up by my right-rear tire, breaking the first couple of clips that hold the rear bumper cover on. Now I have to get plastic repaired on both ends!

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > TheRealBicycleBuck 07/07/2017 at 13:40

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YOU MONSTER!!!

OPPOsaurus WRX > TheRealBicycleBuck 07/07/2017 at 13:46

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WTF man, you have the worst luck with that car, just give it to me

Captain of the Enterprise > TheRealBicycleBuck 07/07/2017 at 13:48

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That sucks two freak incidents in one trip. I’m glad it didn’t hit your condenser and radiator though.

CalzoneGolem > TheRealBicycleBuck 07/07/2017 at 13:48

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You didn’t even stop to put it out of its misery?

TheRealBicycleBuck > OPPOsaurus WRX 07/07/2017 at 15:07

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It has been a rough run. Maybe it needs a name. Something like Voodoo to reflect its nature.

TheRealBicycleBuck > CalzoneGolem 07/07/2017 at 15:09

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I think it tried to escape by jumping over the jersey barrier into the median. Maybe some Good Samaritan going the other way stopped to render aid.

TheRealBicycleBuck > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer 07/07/2017 at 15:12

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It wasn’t a Monster, if anything it was a Silver Bullet.

Oh, wait. You called ME the monster. I’m really more of a Coke guy.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > TheRealBicycleBuck 07/07/2017 at 15:17

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YOU ANNIHILATED A BEER

I’LL REPORT YOU FOR ALCOHOL ABUSE

CalzoneGolem > TheRealBicycleBuck 07/07/2017 at 15:22

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That’s, quite frankly, disgraceful.

TheRealBicycleBuck > CalzoneGolem 07/07/2017 at 19:08

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Let’s face it. It was a ticking bomb. If it wasn’t opened by the impact, any attempts to do so would result in the contents spraying all over creation. Really, let’s hope it finds peace in the ditch.